The night my parents told me they were getting divorced was the night I asked Jesus to come into my heart. I had practically grown up in church, but until that night I had never actually experienced a relationship with Christ. I somehow knew, even at 11, that I would need His help to get through what was coming. He did help me, and my years in middle school were full of participating in the church. By my freshman year of high school, the church I had grown up in went through a terrible fight and a split.
It tore me apart and I nearly walked away from God altogether. How could I trust Him if His own people could do this to each other? I felt abandoned. After a few years of struggling to believe, I decided to go on a weekend retreat called a Chrysalis. Over that weekend, God used the agape love of others to prove to me that he had been there with me all along, that I wasn’t ever alone. I finally let go of my hurt and embraced my faith again. My struggles with my faith were far from over.
Throughout college and after, I’ve struggled with listening to God, believing He is with me, and believing he has a plan for my life. Depression, anxiety, and feelings of failure are frequent companions. Thankfully, Christ is always with me, and He likes to remind of that in many ways – through music, art, and other believers. Even when I feel stuck or that I’ve messed up, I hold on to the promises in Joshua and Jeremiah that he is always with me and he knows the plan for my life, even if I can’t see all of it.
Check out my Church: Unknown, Terre Haute, IN